A Broken Heart on Christmas

I know there are many people suffering with a broken heart this Christmas, and this post is for you.  I hope that this can encourage you.

I wrote the following “poem” a few years ago.  At the time, I was facing the major death of dreams, the sorrow of being disabled and excluded from society (by MCS), grief over many losses, the uncertainty of the future (because of MCS), and the feeling of rejection.  Some of you face similar sorrows.  Others of you have family or friends that hurt you dreadfully; I’m sorry, it’s not right.  Others of you are suffering terrifying news, crushing disappointment, hopelessness….

The Christmas Sham

by Christa Upton

Christmas trees don’t make up for broken hearts;
Christmas lights and candy don’t heal sorrow.
Pretty decorations, presents, and cookies
Can never take away the ache, the sadness, the loneliness.
Christmas music sometimes sounds so fake;
Wishes seem hollow when your world’s falling apart.
Stockings, dinners, and parties
Don’t fill the empty spots we feel.
Just like Charlie Brown, sometimes we falter.
We wonder why we don’t feel Christmas happiness.
Five cents at Lucy’s booth won’t give us the cure.
Our world seems to think that
Things should be okay and happy,
But sometimes the only way we can agree with that
Is to pretend.
Even if we never see our dreams on earth,
Even if we seem to suffer on and on,
When we are following Jesus,
It is not for us to hang our heads in shame,
For even the men of faith listed in Hebrews
Did not receive on earth what was promised them.
What does it mean?  Sometimes we don’t understand.
But someday You will come for all who love You,
Draw us close to Your lovely Presence,
Bring us where there are no tears or pain, one day.
And everything will be okay.


Christa Upton    Black Hills Picture Books     PO Box 293     Custer, SD 57730

About Christa Upton

I am a wife and mother of three children ages 11, 14, and 18. I used to be a stay-at-home mom (teaching piano & dance, volunteering, etc). From 2007 to 2010, I suffered accidental Toxic Injury (also called Multiple Chemical Sensitivity or MCS). MCS has had major impact on our family, but the forced time in bed has given me time to write. So far, I have published 4 children's books (2 in e-book format on Kindle, one in Print-on-Demand at CreateSpace, and one printed by a local printer). Sometimes I miss my old life, but I love writing for children!
This entry was posted in Caregivers, God's Grace/Encouragement, MCS/Chronic Illness, Suffering/Grief. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to A Broken Heart on Christmas

  1. Katie Updike says:

    This is beautiful, Christa. Puts quite a different perspective on the holidays. Thank you.

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